Typical shyness isn’t a problem. It can even be charming and attractive. But when shyness feels “turned up to a 10” and freezes you in place, then it becomes a challenge that deserves attention.
This kind of shyness shows up as a strong worry that you won’t know what to say, or that people are judging you badly at social gatherings, in class or at the office. You might even feel panicky and sick. And you typically say to yourself:
- “They’ll think I’m stupid if I say _______”
- “Everyone here is watching me”
- “I must look weird to everyone”
- “I never know what to say, I need to just be quiet”
You might find yourself feeling sad and lonely because usually you:
- Avoid going to parties or social events
- Avoid answering your phone or calling people back
- Avoid applying for jobs or volunteering for opportunities
- Avoid complaining to customer service when orders are wrong
- Drink too much in public so you feel at ease
In the end, intense shyness limits your success in business or at school. It robs you of love and intimacy. It makes for a very small world.
Therapy for Social Anxiety at Your Pace
There is a lot more information about intense shyness (the medical term is Social Anxiety), and you can learn more below. But whatever the term, this kind of worry keeps you from fully living life.
Fortunately, intense shyness is very treatable. I use and teach proven tools and methods that, when we work together, will allow you to feel more freedom and confidence.
There are four steps:
- I’ll help you decide the level of social closeness you want and need in your life. We work at your pace.
- If you need, I’ll teach you how to manage intense bodily feelings of anxiety (jitters, sweating, nausea, etc.) that comes up in social situations.
- I’ll show you how to challenge and replace the negative beliefs that keep you stuck in fear that you are being rejected or judged.
- Finally, you’ll get to practice being social, and little by little, get confident in your new social skills.
Call for Therapy in Westchester that Works
I know it takes courage to talk to a therapist, so I want to acknowledge yours. Now, take the next step to feeling better. Call (914) 768-3740, or email me by completing the form here .
Some Facts about Social Anxiety
If you recognize the feelings and experiences above, you are not alone. According to the Anxiety Disorders Association of America:
- About 15 million American adults have social anxiety
- Social anxiety fear is the third most prevalent psychiatric disorder in Americans, according to the National Comorbidity Survey, a U.S. poll on mental health.
- Typical age of onset: 13 years old
- 36 percent of people with social anxiety disorder report symptoms for 10 or more years before seeking help
To learn about other types of anxiety that I treat, click here. Watch the video below for a message from me.